Interesting searches

Now for something a little different…

I thought I’d share a little funny behind the scenes of this blog for a moment.
If you’ve never done a website or blog you should know that most sites have back end information to help the webmaster promote their site.  Usually information like how many visitors, what country visitors are from, top commenter etc.
One of the statistics that I can see on the back end of my blog is the keywords put into a search engine to reach my site.  For instance, if someone Googles “colon cancer” and my site comes up in the search and they click on it, “colon cancer” will show up in the list of terms that I can see from the back end.

Here’s what the page looks like…

There’s at least a few hundred terms. I check these periodically and I just have to share some of the ones that have given me a good chuckle if not an outright belly laugh.  Many of them I have no idea why my blog would come up for those search terms, but I guess it did.  And now that I’m putting these directly into a post, the search terms should get even more interesting.

Here’s some of my favorites:

my anus hurts after pooping        – doesn’t sound pleasant
sore in crack of arse after arsehole causing itching       – really should get that checked out!
asshole comes out a little        – um…
why does my left side of my belly hurt when i press on it        – haha  I know it’s not funny for that person, but this one made me chuckle.
what is exactly in my left side nearly my waistline        – I don’t know and I don’t think a website will tell you
why do i have skin hanging out my anus        – eww
mexico hot air balloon resort rides        – why did this come up on my site?
why is my anus bleeding after        – after what???
i am itching & the bumps come more when i scratch a certain place       – where???
“are you fucking serious?”        – haha  yes.  yes I am.
when i poop my anus comes out        – I don’t think that’s supposed to happen.
pictures of where the bowel comes out of        – For what?
lump on my upper gum        – How is this connected to my blog?
why people with stomas have bowel movements        – why wouldn’t we?
insides coming out with bowel movement        – Another one?
red thing that comes out of my butt        – Interesting.
how to get a high white blood count        – why would you want one?
not having a baby but geting a kicking movement in my tummy        – ???
call me tomorrow        – haha  interesting thing to search
nursing facility images of frustration        – someone’s upset with their care
poop coming out of butt        – yes, that’s where it comes from
painful sores on anus hole        – ouch.
my anus has come out        – you should see someone about that
allan gamagami attitude        – haha this is my surgeon.  someones checking up on him.
i had a party last night sorry you couldn’t come        – that’s OK?
im tired love your face        – love yours too.
i’m tired need a break from facebook        – I guess I’m a good facebook break
fly comes out of skin        – WTF?
the fuck did you just say        – you heard me.
i have a white long lump growing out of my leg        – ick.
is my anus hole normal        – I have no idea.
2 hours later spongebob        – weird.
burger and fries with glass of tea        – sounds good

 

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