When I don’t post for awhile it’s usually 1 of 3 things:
1. I’m keeping busy. I’ve been trying my best to get back to as normal of a life as possible. I’ve been going to band rehearsals and support groups and classes. Keeping busy makes me feel like I’m crusin along just like everyone else. Since I’m restricted in some things (like swimming) this is really important to me. And sometimes I have so much going on that I don’t even get the chance to come here and brag about all the cool stuff I’m doing. Like cleaning toilets.
2. I have company. And I LOVE it when company comes! My dad has been out to visit a few times, my friend Melissa from my corps days was here for a week and most recently my mom was here. Of course I wanna hang out with people while they’re here so I don’t tend to spend time on here when I have visitors.
3. I’m down/tired/drained. This doesn’t happen too often, but it does happen. Sometimes it’s the chemo and sometimes it’s just having cancer. There’s a lot to process sometimes.
When I’ve been away from the blog, don’t feel like you’re pestering checking in. I really do appreciate it. I may not respond right away, but it’s nice to be thought of.
I went to my first support groups this last week.
The first one I went to was a young survivors group. I was one of the oldest there. It was mostly people in their late 20’s and early 30’s. I have to say I honestly walked away from that group extremely grateful. Listening to the stories I can honestly say that I’m good with where I’m at. Some of the stories were just heartbreaking.
There was one woman who was diagnosed with uterine cancer at 32 while she and her husband were trying to have a baby. She lost her chance at having a biological child. She got through treatment and now her husband is leaving her.
There was a man who was about 27ish. He had bladder cancer and has started having symptoms again but has no health insurance to pay for the scans to get checked out. Poor guy is completely stressed out.
Another woman who was diagnosed at 22 has been fighting with her family and struggling through chemo.
Story after story. I had nothing to share, really.
I also went to a Stage IV Survivor group. I was by far the youngest in this group. The stories in this group were equally heartbreaking.
There was a woman who has melanoma that has spread to her bones and head. The doctors have told her there isn’t anything they can do for her. Not even chemo. She’s on a clinical trial pill that they have told her “will buy her some time”.
There were also stories of hope in this one too though. I met a woman named Barbra. She’s a 13 year stage IV survivor. And she’s amazing!
The thing I got out of both of these groups is how important support is to me. I may not connect with very many people in these groups, but I’m going to continue to go. I can still learn something about myself from each person in both groups. And I look forward to it.
Another thing I learned about support recently is I really do love visits and contact. If you were planning a trip to SoCal, let me know. We have extra room and I really love having guests. Better yet, even if you weren’t planning a trip out this way, come on out! And if you can’t make it, I understand. How about a text? Or FB message? I love that too. And if I don’t get back to you right away, I’m sorry, but I will eventually 🙂